I used to post every week and I haven't for a few months. Why is this? While I was in school I was majorly busy. When I wasn't in class, studying, doing papers, I was filming for the University's TV station and doing administrative work for the University's literary journal.
I have put my family and friends on hold for months. I finally get some time off since I started post-secondary (2 1/2 - 3 years ago) and I visit a few people - just once. Is it odd that I feel so much pressure to do everything and everything right? To excel in my work but try to have a social life and maybe even volunteer?
My reaction? I end up staying at home where it's comfortable. I continue to be productive though - I clean up around the house, sell some items on eBay, dive into reading that I never had time for, and so on. I just don't want to come out of my shell. I don't want to talk to anyone about anything "serious" so to speak. About the future, or about life. I am grateful for this time off.
So when I finally update this journal, it's just a bunch of pondering. I have been going 90mph for so long that I just don't want to go out into the world just yet. Not now.
And after reading this over, I feel a little nervous for posting but I know I have to.